Celebrating My 20K Day

crispydocUncategorized 4 Comments

[A friend - let's call him Mr. 20K - graciously acceded to write the guest post below after a conversation about his unusual frame of reference piqued my curiosity. I hope you'll savor his thoughts and ruminations as much as I did.]

I was catching up on some Crispy Doc the other day and enjoyed a post on his recent birthday.  I mentioned to him that I, too, recently celebrated my birthday (which, like CD, is nearing the big five-oh).  Except – this year I decided instead to celebrate what I’ve dubbed 20k day.  After describing to him what 20k day is, he flattered me by asking if I’d like to write a guest post.

I’ve reached that stage of my life where I’ve started actively reflecting on where I’ve been and where I’d like to be going.  On who I am and who I’d like to be.  For most of my adult life I assumed my personality was pretty well set and established.  I am who I am.

Without going off on a whole nature v. nurture tangent -- I've come to realize in the last few years that I’m very much the product of my life experiences, my parent’s influence, my cultural surroundings and my peers.  Is change and evolution still possible?  I decided to go on a quest to find out.

I’d never been a particularly spiritual person, so I decided to take up a meditation practice and now have 700 sessions totaling 125 hours under my belt (according to the great app I use to guide me).

I’d never thought much about animal welfare or the environment, so I have adopted a plant-based diet.

I’d never had role models who communicated in an open or vulnerable way, so no shock that that hasn’t been a part of “my essence”.  My wife and I found a great therapist and we’ve learned to share our feelings and our needs in a healthy way.  And on and on.

I heard a saying once that sounded just plain wrong, but which I’ve come to realize is the path to change.  It’s easier to act your way into a new way of thinking than think your way into a new way of acting.  It actually works.  (I’ve also started acknowledging when I’m wrong – maybe my biggest breakthrough to date!)

Now I’ve seen that evolution is possible. That has made me encouraged and excited and optimistic about the future.  After some quick math, I estimated that I have twenty thousand more days to live (which will put my expiration date at 101 years, which for some will probably seem optimistic, for others pessimistic, and for most probably just morbid.  Everybody’s different -- as I annoyingly remind my kids multiple times a day!).

So this year instead of a traditional birthday, which by definition is focused on the past (i.e., there are now 47 years behind me), I celebrated my 20k Day.  This is a day to rejoice in everything I have in front of me.  A day to celebrate who I can be, rather than who I am or was.

The very idea of it seems kind of sappy.  Good.  So now I’m sappy too.

I plan to celebrate my 15k Day, my 10k Day, right on down to 1k Day and beyond.  I’ll do my best to remain grateful and excited about all the days still to come, and all the opportunities I have to keep becoming more of who I want to be.  And I will do my best not to dwell on the diminishing number of “K’s” – what’s the point of that?

So.  Wherever each of you are in your journeys, I wish you all many happy K-Days to come.

Comments 4

  1. This is an inspiring post.

    Probably like many medical professionals, when I was growing up, I was told I was “smart,” and therefore I did not develop a growth mindset, which has been a disadvantage. (Hopefully I can change that, per growth mindset’s philosophy!) Trying new things should be easy, but it isn’t when one is afraid of disproving the “smart” label.

    Also, with regard to “it’s easier to act your way into a new way of thinking than think your way into a new way of acting,” I remember learning in a college class that modifying the public’s health behavior (vaccination, smoking cessation) is usually easier when a massive behavioral intervention is initiated BEFORE a public health education blitz. This seems to be a practical example of the adage.

    Thanks for a great post.

  2. IF you make age 65 you can expect to live 18 more years (age 83) or 30,317 total days. At 47, 17,168 days are in the bucket and you have yet to even reach 23,743 (age 65) which triggers the extra 18 year expectation. As a 47 yo man you can expect an end game of 75 years or 27,395 days.

    At 47 you have about 10K, (not 20k) days left. At 65 with the extra 18 years added you’ll have about 7K days left. The odds of living to 100 for both sexes is 1.73%. The odds of living to 100 as a male is 0.17 * 1.73 or 0.29%, so you have less than a 29/10000 chance of reaching 101. It’s an interesting dilemma as you approach the goal the probability of ever reaching the goal is exponentially diminished. Also nothing is said of the quality of the end of days.

    1. Thanks for the reply and the audit Gasem. As mentioned, I expected some would find my projected date of demise optimistic, particularly in light of current mortality tables. I’m happy to be optimistic.

      Either way, for me the value is in the idea, rather than the likelihood of the number.

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